5.22.2013

Coming to Terms With Failure

|| Coming to Terms with Failure ||
Matthew 6:19-21

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will also be.” 


Failure is never an easy thing to deal with, especially when you feel like you’ve done everything humanly possibly to succeed. Yet the better you get is never good enough or worse, you don’t get better. At one point or another in our lives we face failure. It's a life lesson which we must all come to terms with.

I absolutely hate to lose, and what I’m about to write is definitely not saying we should strive to lose but rather pay attention to what importance the failure has on our life. This topic is super raw for me because I’ve recently dealt with failure of my own, where you can’t quit but every bone in your body is tired of trying. I tear up just thinking about it but my recent failure has taught me a lot about myself and I hope to provide some type of insight for you in your past, present, or even future failures.

First thing I learned, I am not a good team player unless I’m on top of the team. It’s easy to be supportive of those that you’re better than but what do we do for those that beat us? We should support them no matter what, but let me tell y'all, I stink at it! I love to win and find myself more frustrated at my defeaters than myself. When you lose it’s easier to hate the ones that beat you rather than evaluating your own effort or capability in something.

I have learned that it is never someone else's responsibility to make you better at something. It is completely your own and no one else should be blamed for your own short comings. I’m terrible about this too! I learned to stop crying about things I could fix and be proactive. Which is exactly what needs to be done in our Christian life. Instead of feeling bad for someone, pray for them. Take action.

I have learned to know when it’s time to stop. Practice makes perfect can be true but I’ve become much more aware of my strengths and weaknesses. We have to know when we’re not good at something, and learn when enough is enough. God’s blessed us all with talents but no one person can do it all, and He doesn’t expect us to! It’s much better to put all hard work and determination into something for Him that honors and glorifies His name instead of wasting your precious time on something that isn’t doing anything for you!

I have learned not to put so much importance on earthly wins but wins for the Kingdom of God. We love to win the trophy, medal, prize, or have our names featured in the newspaper. Yet we could care less if we’ve failed the only one who really matters: God. I ask myself daily how can I get better grades or be better in this or that, but when was the last time I said, "God I’ve failed you." It's easy to see our earthly failure and be concerned, yet we neglect to see our shortcomings in our relationship with Christ. We work so hard to achieve goals in our daily lives yet we seem to forget we should be achieving goals for God!

I finally remembered something I learned a long time ago, my failures in a worldly event aren't of life-or-death concern level to God. What have I done for His team lately? Stayed up late studying HIS word, telling someone all about His awesome power, devoting my time to serving Him? No, because I found myself desiring a win in the world that isn’t going to stay for long. It’s not going to matter what I did on earth for myself but what I did for His Kingdom, that’s why we’re here, to bring honor to Him not ourselves.

The Bible says it’s important to store up heavenly treasures because those we gain on earth will ALL fade away. Now don’t get me wrong, competition is a great part of life along with failure. But we have to watch our lives as Christians. Are we putting off a witness for Him and being devoted wholeheartedly to God's kingdom or are we so wrapped up in our earthly teams or individual competitions we forget what’s most important? I know I did and I see the mistake now but it took nearly a whole year to realize what I had become: someone who couldn’t come to terms with her failure. A girl who loved God but loved the win. I went through times where my happiness was dependent on success and couldn’t face people knowing I had failed at anything. I abandoned the thought of failing God, unconcerned about my personal relationship with Him because if I could finally win, all would be well with the world.

But it wasn’t, because I failed at something much more life altering.

I failed to remain committed to God the one who sent a Savior for me.

Thank the Lord for open arms! I look back on this time of searching for success and while I regret lost time I also thanks God for the chance to really fail. When we fail we’re brought to a low place where we see some things we don’t see at the top of a success mountain! It’s easy to feel special when we’re being told how special we are by the world. It’s harder when people see us fail. I cared so much about people's opinions of my success I just left God, watching and waiting for me. I didn’t care what I was winning or losing for His Kingdom, I just cared how I felt.

The craziest thing is, I thought that I could really make myself happy once I was on top, but I couldn’t. God doesn’t work that way, He loves us at our lowest points. Not only when we’re succeeding in our walk with Him but when we’re at our breaking point. He cherishes us for all of our failures, he sent His Son to save us for a reason, because He loves us. We’re all failures who are literally nothing without God. We’re of no worth or value without the King, the One who created us.

So, ask yourself, have you come to terms with being a failure? Have you realized that’s what’s so amazing about God? He loves us despite all of this.

In his Love,

Elleigh Ann


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